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On Unicorns

I realize that this is not really the place for this, but I do not really care.

When I was a child, my mom managed to get a copy of the book "Unicorns I Have Known", by Robert Vavra. And I loved that book just as much as she did. I don't remember how old either of us were, but I know that my home life was not a happy one. And I didn't just think unicorns are real, I BELIEVED it, and still do. As far as I am concerned, they are still around, only hiding. Vavra also speaks of an event that happened when he was shooting for his book: One of the models escaped and stopped by a road, just as a schoolbus was driving by. And the children and the teacher and the bus driver stopped to stare in awe.

This kind of hope is what's wrong with the world now. There is no hope, or mystery. We don't care if anything unusual passes by us, as it's part of our daily life. But if I ever see a unicorn, I will not only watch, I will bow to it and thank it, for I will never be more sure of anything than I am at that very moment. I am by no means normal, nor was I ever. I fed the fae, and danced with coyotes, and spoke to cats. Perhaps I would be happier, if I had less of a 'normal' life, and one more suited to my mother's tales of witchcraft and magic, where the dragons and gnomes are real, and we carry elven blood.

My gifts are mostly gone now. I can no longer speak to beasts, only understand them. There is no more magic in my life, and maybe that's the problem.

I am an animal

just like the rest of you. But I don't believe that there's anything that seperates them from me. I walk upright on two legs, and so do some of them. The biggest difference isn't our lack of fur (like the reptiles), or our thumbs (every animal  has them, and we don't actually NEED them). It is that we are more arrogant than they. We convince ourselves that we are more civil than they, when really, are we? What does it mean to be civil? (DON'T give me the definition, seriously) All it means is that we do not fight, in the long run. But we do, don't we? Just like animals. We get jealous when another person flirts with our mate, because we are territorial. We are not a seperate type of animal on our own. We are a pack animal, not a herd animal like we have become. Herd animals on their own start out smarter, but become stupider when in a group, as are humans. A person is smart. PEOPLE (in general, there are some exceptions) are dumb. We have been known to panic like cattle. The Salem Witch Trials, the Spanish Inquisition. When something we don't understand is perceived as a threat, we go apeshit. Cities are a bad idea. We are societal, but not on a large scale. We can manage small towns, but too many of us in one space, regardless of size, there will be trouble, and crime will flourish. There are exceptions, obviously, but these are cultural. Some breeds of animal are more cooperative than others. Do not put down those who come from societies that are not considered 'technologically advanced'.  I consider them more societally advanced, especially WITH the lack of technology. They are closer to each other, and the small villages are more like a pack than our large cities. I also think our animal instincts are why some of us are more dominant (or submissive) than others. We long to be led, and I heard somewhere that there are 10 subs to 1 dom. Does no one else find this just about right? A pack of ten or twenty, if there is an alpha couple rather than just one alpha?

Embrace your animal side before it turns on you. It's a wonderful thing.

Smoking

See, for some reason, smoking (not cigarettes, solely marijuana) has become a very peaceful ritual. When Master is home, one of us will take a hit/breath, and kiss the other, exhaling into the other's lungs. And as strange as it sounds, it's actually a very very personal way to smoke. Not only are you smoking the plant of Solomon's grave, but (for me at least) you're partaking of it with the one you love most, the one you have devoted yourself fully; Sharing their breaths AND their sacraments, breathing in rhythm to the other part of yourself. It is actualy a very calming thing to do, just focusing on your mate's breathing. Because that IS what you do. You can't really focus on yours, because trying to watch both just messes you up, and JUST trying to watch yours makes you lose the breath.

When I'm alone, I smoke differntly, though, and it often affects how much of a high I get.  See, I don't actually take my finger off the carb, let alone take the pipe from my lips. Instead I exhale through the carb, and inhale back again through a bowl. While not being good for most people, but it's very nice to do once in a while, and kicks you higher up and harder.

Alcohol

Frankly, I strongly disapprove of it. I believe, and promote the belief, that the gods, whomever they may be, have provided us with all we need. This also includes different perspectives on the world, and the things necessary to MAKE us see the other ways the world really is. It has the potential to kill you, and make you ill, and angry. One should not drink alcohols save for tonics, such as absinthe or tonic wines. Tonic wines can be used for seeing OR for improving your health.